The candidates roasted each other at the annual Alfred E. Smith Memorial Dinner last night. I have to say the McCain took the night. He was hysterical and graceful (I miss that John McCain), though Obama was pretty damn funny, too. McCain takes it to MSNBC and Obama gives a shout out to Fox. Y’all enjoy.
Obama roasts McCain
Serious part with brief tribute to Tim Russert
McCain roasts Obama, pt. 1
part 2 with graceful tribute to Obama’s campaign
After Jerome Corsi wrote his book (can I say again how much I love the Kenyans?), J had this great idea to write a complete work of fiction about McCain, full of blatent lies, and sell it as non-fiction. It would contain great revelations like, “McCain was never a POW;” and that hillarious one making the round about the snakes the Viet Cong planted in McCain’s brain. (No, people, that is *not* true.) If Corsi can make money, why couldn’t he?
Mortimer Hayden Smyth decided that he’d have some fun making up some shit, too. Only he’s proving just how silly the McCain camp is and making up completely random things about Obama. He has a new one for each one of the last 28 days of the campaign. So far we have gems like, “Obama robbed my house;” and “Obama claims he wrote La Bamba.” Let’s see how long it takes for someone to cite Smyth’s work as fact in a chain email. Bets?
**Update: J realized that you absolutely must pause the videos to read the disclaimers. They are, perhaps, the funniest part of the whole bit. (Yes, I should have realized this on my own.)
A little humor. Don’t watch with the kids. Or if you’re a blowhard.
… it would be hysterical. I just read Bob Cesca’s piece over at HuffPo: McCain’s Economic Plan: Blurt Out Random Crap. It’s really funny, complete with video of Pee Wee Herman. But it’s so close to the truth that’s it’s a tad painful. Choosing which bit to excerpt here is wicked hard, but here goes:
The goal: Get McCain on record saying something no matter how ridiculous. This way, he can hit the stump later and boast that he said something with regards to scary stuff in the news. I said something [that didn’t make any sense and was probably a lie] and Senator Obama didn’t say anything [also a lie]! My friends! And whenever he’s accused of routinely blurting out random crap, Senator McCain trucks out the old punishment theorem: If Senator Obama had only agreed to the town halls, I wouldn’t be selling-out the last shreds of my honor or integrity just to get elected. Can’t you see? Senator Obama turned me into a hack, dammit!
I have just had the shittiest couple of days and I’ve been in a nasty mood. Chris Kelly just about turned my gray skies blue with his piece in HuffPo today, “The Delicate Subject of John McCain’s Marbles.” I laughed ’til I cried. Here’s a tease:
“Evil must be defeated!” — John McCain 8/16/08
“Enough is enough! We’re going to put an end to greed!” — John McCain 9/17/08
It’s inspiring to know that John McCain has a plan to end greed. I just hope it doesn’t distract him from his mission to defeat evil. Either way, it has to kick the shit out of whatever Barack Obama’s got on the docket, with his empty words and pie-in-the-sky promises.
Please go read the rest. You’ll be glad you did.